What I know (sappiness galore)

For absolutely everybody, there is hope. You have no idea how gray, bleak and hopeless my life was for several years after I immigrated to America. I tried to be regular, I tried to be like everybody else, I stepped on myself, I was heart broken, near suicidal (which, for the record, lies nowhere near my personality, but it was that bad). I did not see the light in the end of the tunnel at all. And here I am, living my dream. Feeling as free as I did when I was very little and did not yet know fear of life. Feeling that horizon expands for me, if I work on it hard enough. There is really, really, everything. No matter how broke you are, no matter how old you are. The biggest stopper is one’s own (your own, my own) blindness and stupidity. What a waste when it wins.

A tweet

I have the best accountant for musicians ever. She is just wonderful!

Triangular

Two people who influenced me quite a bit in my torn teen years (on a human level and on a musical level – which is the same in a way), were at my show yesterday – one on stage, one in the audience.

Both of them told me very special things afterwards. It is a trip to hear compliments from people whose sacred records I consumed greedily as an anonymous listener, in my room, not even hoping for a possibility of them ever knowing my name. Can I die in peace now? Then why is it that I feel so misunderstood and so alone with my agenda?

There are people, streets, nice outfits, big smiles. There are business meetings, lovers and bypassers who peek into my life. I can play that game, oh, I can play that game. I can toss that ball right back into somebody’s face and watch that face melt into a triangular shape Picasso would envy.

Oh well, if that face wants to be melted, so be it…